Is it Memorial Day yet?

I know it's a bit late, but I was going thru some pics from our first parade as a family :) Awww... ain't we cute? Well, the hot wife and Braeden are cute at least, right?



Nick

I remember... Monday...

* I'm not sure you all can appreciate how scary it is to go to the bathroom and see something red hanging from your junk. I wonder how much of your life is taken away from you every time your heart skips a beat... No worries though. It was just a piece of string that must have latched on from my man panties. God I hate when underwear are called man panties...

* No poker tournaments this weekend, but I did manage to get released to play H.O.R.S.E. Saturday night. Left up about $40 again. Big money!

* Along the lines of ya'll not appreciating things... I don't think ya'll appreciate just how awesome the hot wife is. We're sitting at home Friday night, and her boss calls. I wish she still blogged so she could tell this story. But she doesn't, so the task falls to me. Anyways, her boss calls. Now, keep in mind that she just started this new job like a month ago. Well, her boss tells her that she is doing such a great job, that he wants to talk to her this week about a raise! And he wanted to tell her Friday night so she could have a better weekend!

* I realized Friday night that I'm one step closer to retiring and becoming a stay at home dad. Yay. Me.

* I'm not so sure I like my horoscope today:

The stakes are getting higher in your life, which is not only exciting but also a good sign that you're getting closer to the success you want. However, you have a little bit more to lose right now. Therefore, you should keep an eye out for people who might not have your best interests at heart. Someone could be devising a scheme to put you at a disadvantage. Someone might be saying things about you that aren't true. Sunshine is a great disinfectant, so get any suspicions out into the open.

* And now, a question. I've been following a discussion on another site. Our local newspaper reported on a sexual assault of a child. Gee, haven't heard of that one lately huh? Anyways, they withheld the name of the "accused" to prevent the victim from being identified. Quite the dilemma. Obviously there are two sides of the issue, and I'm just not sure what side I'm on. Not taking into account that false accusations do occur, but assuming the accused is guilty of the crime. Is it more important to report the facts of the crime, or to protect the identity of the poor kid. I think as a citizen I would say it's more important to protect society from this creep, and if we don't know who it is, how can we be protected from them? But then I put myself in the shoes of the parents of this kid. Would I want my child's identity revealed in that situation? I can't say that I would be too happy if it was. What side are you on?

* I don't know how parents of kids who are victims of sex crimes hold it together. I know for a fact I would lose it and I wouldn't rest until that person was dead. Not in jail... but dead. I don't get how as a society we can not only be against the death penalty for these creeps, but we're so soft on them. You molest or rape a child and you sit three or five years in jail and then you're out? That's seriously fucked up.

* Eh, we should end on a lighter note, shouldn't we. Hey, it's Tuesday already! That doesn't really help, does it? Me neither. Oh well.

Nick

Bring down the house... A book review

I've got a rare moment of me time, the hot wife took the boy the visit a friend, so I thought I would post on a book that I started reading recently. It's called Bringing Down the House, and it's the story of the MIT blackjack card counters who taught themselves elaborate card counting techniques and used them to legally take the casinos for millions of dollars.

While I find the book interesting, because I love playing cards, it hasn't made me want to go up to the casinos and try out the techniques :) Which, I wouldn't put past myself... ya know, I'm impulsive like that...

It's a true story that is told from one of the players perspectives and really goes into the details of how these MIT students, and former students, would sneak thousands of dollars across country to avoid being noticed and would use group techniques to take advantage of the odds in blackjack. There are many variations of card counting out there, but this group had a real slick operation. What it boils down to is they would sit counters at the tables, who would just bet the minimum amounts and then wait until the deck was in their favor, with more high cards than low cards left. Then they would signal other players in who would not always count, but bet according to the percentage of higher cards left in the deck. The more high cards left, the more they bet, because the odds were more in their favor. Not a bad way to make a living... And while it wasn't exactly appreciated by the casinos all the time, it was perfectly legal.

I'm not a good blackjack player, I mostly play poker. But it has helped me in that it has made me realize that I need to be more aware of the odds of hitting a card I need. Coincidentally, some of the MIT card counters have gone on to become professional poker players. Andy Bloch comes to mind.

Other than that, I don't get much from the book, but it is an interesting read so far. I would recommend it if you like gambling or card playing technique at all.

Nick

Give me your tired, your poor...

I'm looking for some new reading material. Don't read that wrong, I haven't stopped reading any of your blogs, well, most of you anyways. But some of the blogs I used to read just don't post anymore, and I feel like there is something missing in my life now.

If you're thinking I have stopped reading your blog, chances are I have. Or I just read it on bloglines now, in which case, I wouldn't show up in your stats unless I'm kind enough to drop in to leave a comment. That probably doesn't happen much.

Let me tell you what I like in a blog, and then you can send me links that you think I would like. If you send me a really good one, I'll give you a prize.

- Must post regularly
- Must include at least some witty, clever humor
- Must be about 5'6", blonde, smart... wait, where am I?
- Would prefer if they didn't get more than 57 comments on posts already. I like the less-travelled path.
- A heavy drinker is a plus
- I already have one read who makes their readers teary-eyed on a regular basis, I don't need another.
- Some politics are ok, so long as it's not just bashing George Bush all the time
- Must be kind to animals
- If you know of any twin, blonde, single, college-aged women co-writing a blog, definitely send me that link. Just send that one via email so the hot wife doesn't see....

Ok then. Bring on your best reads!

Nick

HiiiiiiiiYA!

The hot wife had some work to do at home last night. So after putting the boy to bed, I finally took Chuck Norris up on his request to duel.

We stepped into my dojo in the basement. Only, immediately upon seeing my vast array of martial art skills... Chuck knelt. And surrendered unconditionally. Then he got me a beer.



This morning Chuck sent the following email:

From: "C Norris" <>
To: junyer_mint@yahoo.com
Bcc:
Subject: Last Night
Date: Wed, 23 May 2007 10:58:44

Chuck asks for forgiveness and mercy.

Always your student,
Chuck
***

What a little sissy boy.

Nick

You're old and dumb... I'm only dumb...

I guess the United Blogging Council got together and decided that this week's main topic would be age. I've seen the topic discussed on two different blogs now, one is Dawn's and the other is not an appropriate link for this blog.

The topic of age and how that relates to maturity and knowledge and experience and whether or not you should get married is one that I rarely see eye to eye with others on. Because, as you may or may not know, I'm always the exception. Trust me. There's nothing I fucking hate more, than when someone says to me - "well, you're the exception." I've killed people for far less, so don't go there.

Example one. When I was the ripe old age of 19, I got involved in dog rescue. And thru that involvement, helped to start a 10 state Rottweiler Rescue called MidAmerica Rottweiler Rescue. Pretty soon I was on the board of directors as the Adoption Coordinator. And then Volunteer Coordinator. And then Vice President. But many people in that rescue wouldn't have let me adopt a dog because I was under 21, or 25, or whatever stupid number they wanted to put on maturity and the ability to care for a dog.

The justification? "Well, of course at 19 years old, you couldn't possibly know what you want in life." "You're probably going to go to college, and then get married, and then move, and the dog will be out in the street."

I would fight with these people endlessly about age requirements. Don't assign a number to maturity. If someone isn't mature enough to care for a dog, what does it matter if they are 15 or 45? And vice versa. My point was, nothing happens on your 21st birthday that makes you ready and mature enough to do anything. Whether it's drink, get married, adopt a dog, whatever. People should be evaluated on an individual basis and not simply because of their age. It just doesn't mean very much to me. I know 10 year old kids that are more mature than most 50 year olds.

Example 2. I met my now wife when we were 17. Seniors in high school. Virgins (oh the horror!). We fell in love almost right away. After high school we moved out, got a Rottweiler, got jobs, went to college, had a lot of sex, drank, did drugs, whatever. Then we moved again, and still kept our dog. And then we bought a house at 22. And then we got married at 23. And still kept our dog! Had a (gasp!) kid at 27, with TWO ROTTWEILERS! I know, I know, everyone told us the dogs were going to EAT our kid, and then turn on us and EAT US!

What's my point? I seen a comment on another blog that said if you get married in your 20s, before basically sleeping around with as many people as you can, you're making a "big, big mistake". I don't think we made a mistake. In fact, I wouldn't do it any other way. I don't have to picture my wife having sex with someone else, because there is no one else she's had sex with. There's no diseases to worry about. And I certainly have no desire to get divorced now and go sleep with everyone, not that anyone besides the hot wife would sleep with me anyways... But I don't feel like I missed out on anything.

I just don't buy into a lot of the age stereotypes that people throw out there. It's fine if you were too immature at that age to make decisions about your path in life, but don't assume that the rest of us are as well. While we've certainly made some mistakes along the way, and things are not always strawberry fields forever, I think the hot wife and I are great examples of how it can work out. We've made changes in our lives, sure, but we chose to make them together and never once have we felt like we missed out on anything in our lives.

Nick

blah blah Monday

I don't really have much coherent thought going on today, so I think we'll do one of those posts where I go in 15 different directions. Let's roll.

* I actually went to church this weekend. Ok, it's not like I went on my own, but I went for a couple of baptisms and first communions and what not. I have to admit that I'm not sold on all these rituals of the church. They seem pretty pointless to me. And the only thing the priest talked about was how the church is like a winning football team. Let's just say that I didn't leave feeling any different or with the desire to find Christ. I'm lost on the motivation to believe...

* I played poker until 10:30 last night which was not the best idea. But I was up $40, so I kind of had an obligation to ride it thru to the end. We were playing H.O.R.S.E. which is basically five different kinds of poker. It's fun to get away from no limit Texas Hold 'Em, which is what you usually see played on tv. What percentage of my reading audience do you think understands any of the things I post about poker? Probably zero...

* If I could have one super power, it would be the ability to ask certain questions and everyone would have to answer and they would have to tell the truth. I would love to ask why all of you read this blog. But one, I don't think most of you would answer. And two, I don't think everyone would tell the truth. It would be an interesting question to ask, I just don't believe it would do much good to ask it.

* The hot wife and I have talked quite a bit about whether we want to have another child. We've come to the conclusion that while we don't want to take steps that would rule it out completely, if we had to choose right now, we wouldn’t want another one. You'd be amazed at how many people don't like that decision. If one more person tells me my only child is going to be spoiled, I'm going to punch them in the side of the face.

* Leaving open the possibility that we might have another kid is, while somewhat scary, kind of exciting at the same time. I think it would make the difficult times of parenting so much more difficult... but the fun times of parenting... you get the idea. I would want a girl though. If it was another boy, I think I would assume a fetal position and cry.

* blah blah blah, happy Monday.

Nick

And it turns out the sky is blue!

This. This qualifies as journalism? If this is journalism, I should get a fuckin' pulitzer for the shit I come up with on this blog.

First...

Men find photographs of the opposite sex much more ‘rewarding’ than women, according to a study published yesterday.

Uh. Hm. So someone sat at their desk one day and said to themselves... "ya know, I wonder if men like looking at women, more than women like looking at men? I think we need to research this."

I'd like to start a business that does two things. One, whenever someone is about to say something stupid, they would run it by me first and then I would either approve it to be said, or slap them across the face and tell them to shut up.

People say stupid shit all the time, just look at that Imus dude. If he would have just ran that stupid comment by me before saying it, he'd still have a job because I would have man-bitch slapped his ass first.

The second thing my business would do, is whenever someone has a stupid idea for a study, like whether men like to look at women more than vice versa, I could just tell them the conclusion right away and they could research more important things. Like, oh, I don't know... cancer or something.

Anywho. The article continues...

The results, published in the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B, go some way to explaining why Playboy outsells Playgirl, and why men are the dominant users of pornography.

Lord... Who the hell reads the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B??? If I caught myself having nothing better to do than to read that, I'd have to kick my own ass.

Continuing...

By contrast, physical attractiveness was found to have little or no reward for women eyeing images of men, and overall they only "slightly valued" the opportunity to ogle the opposite sex.

Wait, what? I don't actually believe this. Am I supposed to believe that women do not value physical attractiveness? Give me a break. Is that why Brad Pitt is on the cover of every women's gossip magazine on the planet? Hm. I guess it's because he's really nice... By the way, I'm so much better looking than Brad Pitt...

Finally...

The study was carried out by placing 20 heterosexual men and 20 women in front of a database of images, which contained non pornographic photos, typically headshots, of the opposite sex.

An easier way to do this would be to create two sex blogs. On one post pictures of women. On the other post pictures of men. I've actually tried this before... only, on the same blog... Trust me, when the pictures of women are up, it's a comment-love-fucking-fest. When the men are up... crickets.

...
...

...

/crickets.

Nick

Art of the week

Been a while since I've done one of these, though I'm sure none of you noticed... But, here's an interesting idea from Thomas Ballhatchet? over at British Council. As if the poor life of a hamster isn't depressing enough... now it can work to provide for it's own bedding as well. Kind of like throwing an innocent person in jail with some thread and fabric and telling them to make their own bed.

I would expect a little more from Milan Design Week I guess. Not really much exciting from looking over the designboom website. Oh well.

btw - not too many of you interested in history huh? Tough crowd lately...

Nick

Remember Ashoka Maurya

Here's a question for you. Where can you find topics ranging from oral and anal sex to ancient Buddhist history? The answer is here. So gather 'round kiddies. It's story time.

I've always been fascinated by history, and I've always been even more fascinated by war. I love learning about the Civil War, ancient Roman conquests, the World Wars, etc. I must have read Danielle Steele's Message From 'Nam a gazillion times. So when I first heard Mason Jennings song Emperor Ashoka, I was intrigued.

I've studied ancient Rome and Europe. Russia and China. And of course the "history" of the Americas, as much as one can gather from the spoon feeding and regurgitation the public schools offer up... But I've never studied anything from the area which is now India/Pakistan/Iran/Afghanistan, other than the life of Gandhi.

Remember Ashoka Maurya
Remember Ashoka Maurya
Remember Ashoka Maurya
Era of imperialist Buddhist rule

I would never make it as a Buddhist, for the same obvious reasons that most people would never make it as a Buddhist. But I've always been fascinated by it. I think modern culture could certainly learn from it more than it currently does. As I think they could learn from Emperor Ashoka as well...

The story begins in the Mauryan Empire, or what is now modern day India, stretching to about Afghanistan to the north and west, and Bangladesh to the east. Being born a son of Emperor Bindusara, Ashoka excelled in the military and academics. So much so that, being wary of his intentions, his older siblings had him exiled. A few years later he was summoned by the Emperor to quell an uprising, was hurt in battle and then treated by Buddhist monks. This was Ashoka's first exposure to Buddhism.

Some time goes by and as the Emperor is on his death bed, Ashoka learns that he prefers an older sibling to assume power. So he attacks the village that his brothers were in and killed them all. Taking power, he goes on several bloody conquests to expand the borders of the Mauryan Empire.

His last conquest was the state of Kalinga, which prided itself on it's sovereignty and democracy. After an early defeat, Ashoka mounted the greatest invasion in Indian history up to that point and destroyed Kalinga. Over 100,000 were killed and many more deported.

Conquering the kingdom of Kalinga
In the Indian state of Orissa
Brought the death of so many men
Ashoka vowed to never fight again.

As Ashoka ventured out to survey the battlefield, he was struck by the destruction. Corpses and burning buildings everywhere. He was sick, and wondered, "What have I done?" Filled with sorrow, he made the decision to give up war and violence. For the rest of Ashoka's reign, he pursued an official policy of nonviolence. Even the unnecessary slaughter of animals was abolished.

And all across the land, the Emperor's power grew
Love before violence, conflicts with silence

He treated his people with respect and love, no matter their beliefs or caste. He made peace with neighboring kingdoms, which could have easily been conquered, instead sending monks to spread Buddhism.

From every corner of his empire
Had overseers of the law
Teach the brand new policies
Befriending all of his enemies

And from every house
All the people sang
Lets raise up the things that fill us
Put down the weapons that kill us

Now. Kids. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all play like this? Perhaps, if we spread tolerance, generosity and love... instead of conflict and violence... perhaps the world would be a slightly better place.

May your body be strong
May your heart be full
And may you live to be 100 years

Yes. Modern day culture has much to learn from Emperor Ashoka. Much.

Nick

Why is Hillary Clinton always hitting on me?

As some of you know, I am the nation's expert on sexual activity and relations. So from time to time I am called to testify in front of congress on various subjects. In February, it was anal sex. This time, oral sex. Below is the transcripts from today's testimony.



Senator: Is it your opinion that women should be required to swallow after engaging in oral sex?



Me: yes.





















Nick

Tell me how you hate your mother...

Alright, I think it's time to lighten things up a bit. Thank you everyone who commented on yesterday's post. I debated back and forth about whether to post about Natron, because like I said before, I hate posting depressing things. But it helped to tell the story and get it off my chest.

So, moving on... I'm going to try something a little different now. I'm not sure how it will work, or what will come of it, but it could be interesting. You know how when you see a shrink, sometimes they will show you pictures, and you say the first thing that comes to your mind? Well, we're going to mix it up a little. I'm going to write some things, all you have to do is leave comment with the first thing that comes to mind. Remember, don't think about it, just write the first thing you think of.... Let's roll.

1. I've already spilled apple sauce and ketchup on myself today. Luckily I'm wearing a red shirt.

2. I've installed IP blocker on my blog so I can block you.

3. A woman in Texas is currently accused of selling her 15 year old daughter to a man for $3,000. The man was already accused of indecency with a child and possession of child pornography.

4. I have no intentions of seeing Michael Moore's new movie "Sicko".

5. Oral sex spreads the virus that causes cervical cancer and may lead to throat cancer.

6. In two and a half months, our other blog is now averaging just under 10 times the hits this blog is after two and a half years.

7. It takes two to make a thing go right.

Nick

Happy birthday bud...

And the funny thing to me
is how quickly it slips away
and leaves ya longin' for the things
that were never spoken

I usually don't post lyrics to songs. But one of the reasons that I like Mason Jennings is that his songs often capture my mood almost perfectly. And I was listening to Big Sur (Mason Jennings) this morning on my way into work. And it made me think of the last week or so.

I kind of alluded to this with a few posts over the past week, but about Thursday or Friday of last week our male dog stopped eating and had problems with his back end. He would whine going up and down stairs and nothing was passing through. We watched it over the weekend and nothing got better. So Monday I took off of work and took him to the vet. They took some blood and urine and ran some tests, but everything came back fine. So they put him on anti-inflammatory pills.

Tuesday was better. He ate a little canned food and drank some water, and seemed to be moving around better, so we thought the pills were working. We thought...

Yesterday we woke up and discovered he couldn't move his back legs at all. He tried to get up, but there was nothing he could do. Now I was freaking out. For one, he's not a small dog. Before he stopped eating for a week, he was in the 150-160lb range. Monday he was 128lbs, but still a large dog. You couldn't pick him up yourself, that's for sure. The fact that he couldn't help by standing, did not make things any better.

So we call the vet. He refers us to a 24 hour clinic an hour north of us. So we load him up on the comforter from our bed, carry him out to the truck, and I drive him up to the clinic. They take him in on a stretcher basically and I wait for a couple of hours to see what is wrong.

After sitting in a tiny room pulling my hair out, the vet came in. They had it narrowed down to three bad possibilities. Ruptured disc, tumor or stroke. If it's a tumor or stroke, there's nothing we can do. If it's a ruptured disc, he could have surgery to the tune of about $6,000... but if he does ever get use of his back legs back (about a 50/50 chance), it could take weeks to recover. Ugh.

I must have sat there staring at the wall forever... thinking all of this over in my head. What the hell was I going to do? For one, I don't really have 6,000 anythings. I hate for money to be an issue, but jesus. And then it might not even do any good? And how the hell would I carry a 130lb dog outside to piss for weeks while he recovers?

Fuck. At least I know with our other dog, she has a bone tumor. It's just a matter of when she isn't comfortable any more, which probably won't be more than a month or two. But I have some time to evaluate that. Now I'm sitting there and I have to make a decision. My dog is laying on the floor in the other room and he can't even stand up....

So, I assumed the role of god, which fucking sucks. Who the fuck wants to decide life or death? But with no good option for recovery from whatever the hell took his ability to walk and stand away... I made a horrible fucking sucky decision. And one day before his 8th birthday, Natron went to a better place. A place where all his legs work. A place where he gets all the food he can eat. A place where he can chase squirrels until his heart is content.

We miss you bud.



Natron von der Anderung * May 10, 1999 - May 9, 2007

We're a folk singing group from Salt Lake City...

Hearing that our 10 year high school reunion is coming up makes me want to barf all over myself. Not because I didn't like high school, I loved it actually. I would do it over again if I could. Of course, I skipped a lot of it, and when I did go I sold a lot of drugs in class and went in high all the time. But I had a lot of friends from all different groups of people, and they were all in the same place at the same time. I had friends that were skinheads, punks, wanna-be gangsters, dorks, motor heads, jocks, preps... I tried to be cool with everyone I met in high school. I guess a lot of that had to do with the fact that I was high a lot... but either way.

So it's not that I didn't like high school and wouldn't want to see a lot of those people. It's just that, well... holy shit it's been 10 years?!?!?! And I'm still going to school for my bachelor's? And I sit in an office cubicle all day, for the most part? And I still fucking live here? And I have a 6 month old boy and two dying dogs and a picket (not really) fucking fence?

Good lord. This is what I've become. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and my wife and my kid and my two dying dogs. But it doesn't exactly make for a story that anyone else wants to hear. I can't go in there with that. People will be making excuses left and right to get away from me!

The hot wife and I were discussing this last night and we've come up with some options to, er, spice things up a bit... You know, make us a little more interesting. Let me know what you think:

1. I dress up like a pimp and the hot wife comes as my ho. I've always wanted to wear a long purple, furry coat, so this is my favorite option.

2. "Hi, yeah, we're porno stars. Here's our card." The hot wife had a great name for our company, but it escapes me... Wait, what do we need business cards for if we're porn stars? Oh well, it fits nicely I think.

3. We sit in the corner and make out all night. This is really the option if we can't come up with alternative personalities. It would be hilarious to watch everyone's reaction...

4. "Hey! Long time no... oh wait... I'm being beeped... yeah, we're doctors...." Do people even use beepers anymore?

5. "We're a folk singing group from Salt Lake City."

Nick

Cool Braeden

I knew there was a positive to having your mother-in-law (who watches Braeden during the day) live a block away. When it's nice out you can just pick the boy up in the jeep :)



Nick

I think I seen a butt! Oh wait, it was an elbow...

I have a couple of minutes before I pick Braeden up, so thought I would throw this in quick. There's apparently this photographer that goes around the world with a whole slew of people willing to get naked and let him take pictures of them.

That's weird, because usually unless I pay women... they don't get naked for me. And I'm always willing to take pictures, if that's what it takes. What's this guy got that I don't?

Anyways, they broke the record (previously owned by... them) recently when 18,000 people stripped naked in Mexico City. 18,000! I'm comfortable with my body and all, and don't consider nudity a big deal, but no fucking way am I hanging around 18,000 nude people.

Would you?

And now. Your moment of Zen... (photo compliments of Spencer Tunick)



Nick

Monday Monday... na na nanana

* I took the day off today so I could take one of our dogs into the vet. He didn't eat all weekend and was very uncomfortable. Some couple hundred dollars later, we still don't know the deal, but they're running urine and blood tests. He did eat some breadsticks and treats this morning and is outside with the runs, so all that is promising. Hopefully it passes.

* Having the day off when you usually don't have any time otherwise is strange. There are a gazillion things I could do, but who knows where to start? I really need to be a stay at home dad :) Think of how much time we'd have together!

* Took 6th out of 25 players in a poker tournament yesterday. That's right where I need to be to make my goal of averaging in the top 25%. Yay. Me.

* I've invalidated my original executive decision to not allow comments. You can now comment, unmoderated again. Just don't be stupid.

* The hot wife is going to take her real estate license exam this week! Wish her luck :)

* I'm going to take a nap now.

Nick

Fuck you Friday, and the thought process of a working class white male...

I was thinking life over last night as I was trying to fall asleep. It's kind of a routine I go thru, you know, bring all of my thoughts from the day to conclusion. So, I'm laying there thinking about this blog, and that blog, and some of the family issues we're going thru, and who I would vote for for President, and why I just can't bring myself to order anything other than a club sandwich when we order in, etc...

And then... my thoughts drift, as they usually do when my serious thoughts for the day have run their course. And I start thinking about women kissing other women. And why I'm so attracted to two women kissing. Why are men in general so attracted to two women kissing?

Now, sure, one could state the obvious reason. Well, two women are better than one, right? Of course. But there has to be more than that, I think.

And then I started thinking about this blog I was reading the other day, and the guy writing was trying to define sexy. Don't worry, I read these types of blogs after my kid goes to bed... But he was talking mostly about physical characteristics of what is sexy, cheerleaders and schoolgirls with pigtails and what not, which would simply support the - two women are better than one theory.

I'm not satisfied with that theory, so I beging to wonder how I would define sexy. And while I think there is something to physical attraction, I think of sexy as being more about attitude. In other words, you can be the best looking person in the world, but be a total jackass. You can't be sexy and a jackass, at least not in my little world.

So I relate this back to my original thought about two women kissing. I think, and I would need to see two women kissing again to really evaluate this (enter: the hot wife), that my attraction to two women kissing is more about the attitude of the women than it is about the physical visual stimulation. Since this aligns with my opinions on what is sexy, it would make sense.

You may be wondering, "well, what is so appealing about the attitudes of two women kissing?" And I would say, "uh, you just answered your own question." They're kissing! Another woman! Duh. When I see two women kissing, it tells me one of three things about them:

1. They're both attracted to women (sexy)
2. They're just trying to impress men (sexy)
3. I forgot what the third thing would be... (sexy)

I guess my theory is that the male species (men) attraction to two of the female species (women) coupling (kissing) has more to do with the open-minded attitude (slutiness) of the female species (women) involved than it does the simple physical stimulation (watching porn on the computer).

Hmm. Weird. But logical. Fuck it, it's Friday.

Nick

Boys gone wild...

We're so putting this on our Myspace page :)



Nick

This is the last depressing post ever, I promise...

I really haven't felt like myself the past few weeks and for the first time since my father passed away in '04, I've consistently been a little bummed out. Which, coincidentally is why I started blogging in the first place. I wouldn't say I'm depressed really, but I'm definitely not feeling like myself.

For some time we thought our dog had arthritis. When it got worse and not better with pills, we took her back in for more x-rays. It wasn't arthritis, but a tumor in her front leg. And I'm not an expert in this stuff, but it has apparently spread into her chest as well. Bottom line is that she is not going to make it more than a month or two.

I know, I'm a softie, it's just a dog. But you kind of have to understand, the hot wife and I got this dog as 19th birthday presents to each other when she was 9 weeks old. There are so many memories, I wouldn't know where to start. So many things would be so different with us, were it not for her.

And now, as if that wasn't bad enough, our other dog is limping and not eating well and we're worried he might be in the same situation. And I keep flashing these thoughts of having to put both of them down at the same time, which I'm not so sure I can go through.

While I haven't had to put "our" dog to sleep before, practically like a child to us, we've been here before. And the situation we're in kind of reminds me of an article I wrote a few years back for a dog magazine. And the payment for writing it was that the dog rescue I was involved in at the time got to run a free ad highlighting some of their dogs. So, it's kind of an ass kiss to rescue, but whatever.

I usually try to avoid depressing topics, but it kind of highlights the current mood, so I'm going to post it.
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"He’s a rescue dog, he’s had a rough life"

"It’s going to be two shots, right?" I asked, hoping I could leave before the final shot.
"Nope, just one." The vet replied as she put the rubber strap around his arm.
As I sat there on the floor holding my dog as tight as I could and trying to reassure him, I tried to keep from second guessing our decision.

"He’s a rescue dog, he’s had a rough life", I would tell people. I would look for any excuse I could find to justify his aggressive behavior.

"He may need eye surgery..." But that wasn’t it.

Arri was a rescue dog, and he did have a rough life. But there were no excuses for the constant aggressive behavior, for lunging at people, for many of the things he did.

"Now there may be a bowel movement, or he may gasp for air..." She said looking up at me.
"I don’t think I can watch that" I replied as reality began to set in.
"You don’t have to stay if you don’t want."
"What do other people do?"
"Some stay for the dog, and some don’t." she said, trying to make either option sound ok.
I paused. "I’ll stay"

I tried to keep myself together for Arri’s sake. The last thing I wanted was for him to be scared or confused. But it was too late for that. He looked to me for guidance. He was scared, confused. In my mind I kept thinking that I could leave now. I can train this out of him, he can be a good dog, I can just keep him away from people, I can place him in an experienced home.

It’s not his fault... "He’s a rescue dog, he’s had a rough life."

But it was too late for that. He was gone. I pulled his collar off, and put it in my pocket with his leash. I stared at Arri, and then at the floor, and then back at Arri. He was gone. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I knew the right decision had been made. But my heart felt like it had been ripped out of my chest. I wanted nothing more than to drag his breeder in there to watch, to drag the jerk who kept him tied up outside in there to watch. As if somehow that would have made me feel better. If only they had cared. If only they had seen the good dog that we had seen. If only they had taken the time.

It took me months to come to that decision, to put one of my own dogs to sleep. We spent those months training him, socializing him, but he only seemed to get worse. He was like so many others. Dogs who never got enough socialization, who never got enough training, who never got enough love. Like so many other rescue dogs, he spent days outside, with little water, little food. He bounced from place to place before he finally settled in our home, to be the pet he was never allowed to be, but it was too late for that.

In the short time he was with us, he changed many minds. Some for the better, for people he liked. Some for the worse, for the people who were on the other end of his aggressive behavior. It was devastating to think that people would leave our house with not a positive view of Rottweilers, but just the opposite. People stopped coming over, or they asked to make sure our dogs were put away. We had tried so hard to show people how good Rottweilers could be, but really we were showing them how bad they could be.

When I got involved in Rottweiler rescue almost 5 years ago, I never dreamed I would have to go through that. I never dreamed that doing something that felt so good, would end up making me feel so horrible. I know that I’m not alone because almost everyone involved in rescue that I have talked to has had to go through this very same thing. Despite what their heart tells them, they know it is the right decision to make. They know they cannot afford to have dogs out there which create a negative image for Rottweilers. They know they cannot afford to have aggressive dogs out there in the public eye. Dogs that may someday end up biting someone. The problem is real, I know that now, and they deal with it every day.

Rottweiler rescue volunteers deal with the dogs that no one else wants to deal with. Dogs that are the victims of ill-planned moves, irresponsible college students and breeders in search of quick money. Many of them help behind the scenes, and sometimes we can forget they are even out there. Many are burnt out and broke, and yet they deal with it every day. They deserve our appreciation, our support. They deserve our "Thank You".
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Nick