Women are complicated

Here is a topic sure to shock the senses... So I was reading thru all the really funny rants and raves over there at craigslist, which btw, Design magazine did a nice interview with Craig, the mastermind behind craigslist. Not sure where to find it online though. But I digress... A lot of the posts are really funny and original, which is hard to find on the internet these days. But there is one common theme I keep seeing repeated, from, Im assuming the women posters. And that is that, most men are just no good at oral sex, and usually worthless in bed altogether. You hear this in movies all the time as well.
Now first of all... I realize I live a sheltered life, but when did women all of a sudden become so ungrateful? And doesnt this imply to you the assumption that these same women think they are any better at oral sex or in bed? I dont know, but my guess is they are really just trying to push their own inabilities off on the poor guys who have had the misfortune of being with these cold, heartless whiners.
But besides all that... its not like the female body is incredibly simple. Most women cant even figure it out for themselves. Thats why there is a huge market for erotic toys and contraptions and all that stuff to help out. If women cant even figure it out for the most part, how in the hell are guys supposed to? We're not magicians. We're not used to all the toys and stuff. If a guy cant figure himself out with his hands, we chalk him up as a lost cause. No such luck with women. If you cant figure everything out in the 10 minutes you get before she is filing her nails and talking on the phone, you're the latest rant on some website.
So from now on, cut your guy a little slack. If you even know what it takes, help a brother out a little. If you dont even know, then find out and get back to us. And we'll all live a little happier ever after.

peace nick

I cant think of titles anymore...

So here is a good show for ya, if you so happen to live in driving distance of Madison, WI...

http://www.luthersblues.com/lb/details.php?id=457

Mindy Smith sounds a tad country for me, but Im really interested in seeing Garrison Starr and Charlie Mars. I know Garrison has done some touring with Mason Jennings, and Ive caught a few of her songs. Good stuff, all good stuff.
So I got to take a tour of the Kohler manufacturing plants today. Over 5 years working here and Ive never been on the tour... go figure. But man, how cool! I realize my opinion is biased, I wouldnt have it any other way, but it is one of the most interesting tours Ive ever been on. You can see everything from whirlpool baths being assembled, to the cast iron foundry, to brass finishing, and on and on... And the coolest part is, some of these processes have been done almost the same way for the better part of the last century. The tour guide was telling us of one guy who did the same grinding job for 43 years. 43 years! Could you imagine getting up every day and doing basically the same thing for 43 years? Thats unheard of these days. I started here when I was 19, I'll be damned if Im going to be doing the same thing when Im 62. Im retiring at 40, ready or not...
Anywho, moving on... unfortunately, last night I happen to catch the first new bachelor show. Is it just me, or are none of the women the bachelor picked worthy of advancing? In fact, I would have had trouble picking 5. Aside from most of them being just ugly, most of them are just in it to get married and have kids. Gee... is it any wonder none of these couples ever make it more than a year? You dont put two barely attractive, wildly successful people together, send them on unrealistic, fantasy-land dates and then expect the relationship to survive the real world.
I think the next bachelor should be in the city, the people have their first date in a smoky, loud bar, and they should preferably have at least some body fat. This is the real world. This fantasy crap they do now is just depressing to those of us who dont have fancy job titles, perfect bodies and tons of cash.
TV in general is just depressing. It should be football, 24/7.

peace nick

Need beer.

Why is it the one day I actually feel like going to the bar and getting drunk, I have school? I guess its that thing where you want what you cant have. Or maybe the better question is - why cant we have what we want? No... thats a stupid question....
Dont you hate it when people say - "there are no stupid questions"? I would estimate that about 80% of all questions are stupid. Alright, maybe not 80%, but c'mon.... no stupid questions?
Alright, enough with the stupid stuff. So Ive noticed the blogger world is becoming increasingly creative with their .html codes. Im not going to say this is stupid (see previous sentence) but isnt the whole point of a blog to be simple and to the point? If you want funky .html coding, why not just make a website?
Im going to resist this trend and stick with the basic black backround, white lettering. I think its cool these days to be basic. Everyone else is trying to be all fancy and I think that just takes away from the real point of this blog stuff, what people have to say. Of course, what do I know... I just rag on other people for the.... um... uncool stuff they do on their blogs. I wonder if anyone is complaining about what I do in mine..... Well, let me know if you see anything.

peace
nick

blog... huh huh... yeah.....

So hey, my first comment... neat. Thanks, I'll try not to let it get to my head. Didnt really get the blog.... roller.... thingamajiggie. Oh well.
I wonder how reporters and article... writer... people (what would be that job title?) deal with the fact that the public reads their thoughts. Do they feel obliged to discuss their own articles with people, or distance themselves from them? Take that chick from Sex and the City. Dont her own friends ever read her article? I never see them discussing it together. Is she ever forced to discuss her article topics afterwards? She's always giving advice, but it never seems to be directly related to her articles.
Ive written opinion articles for my local newspaper and people always want to talk about the issue with me. I guess I prefer to distance myself from my writing. Its almost a break from reality where I get to put my thoughts down in a way Im just not usually capable of communicating in person, or just dont want to. Im strange that way I guess.
I guess I just admitted to watching Sex and the City.... Crap.... Well it should be a goal for any guy to try to penetrate the female thought process. I like to think of it as entertaining research.... yup, thats it....
Well, back to shower doors......

peace-nick

Is it Friday yet?

Man, what a week. I do adoptions for a Rottweiler Rescue group called MidAmerica Rottweiler Rescue. Its been nuts lately! There are literally dogs all over the place, and their situations are constantly changing as our team of volunteers tries to put them anywhere they can before they are put to sleep.
If you ever want more stress than one person can handle, try coordinating, or even just being involved in, the placement of dozens of dogs, throughout 10 states, over email, while at work.... I like to give it hell during the week, but man, Im looking foward to downing a few beers this weekend.
Which reminds me, Ive been meaning to plug my favorite beer, since I dont think many people know about it. Its Blue Moon beer, its made by Coors, and it goes great with an orange slice and some barbecue pizza. Its a great beer, a little cloudy, but dont let that fool you. Its very smooth, and does not have a funky taste like some domestic import wannabes. So put down your boring Bud Light, or Miller if you are one of those sickos, and give a real beer a shot.
Its amazing how much you have to prod people to actually try something new... If you like the radio, only drink Miller and and have a pnk blog, you need to leave, go find the highest building with a window, and jump. Live a little you boring.... ah, why am I wasting my time... I have training to go to...

peacenick

I thought school was hard...

Remember seeing on tv how people were studying for their college courses, reading tons of books, and basically dedicating their whole lives to school? Those people are dumb. If you just procrastinate and do everything at the last minute, preferably the day of your class, you will retain the information you need much better. In general, procrastination is the way to go. Trust me, I know what Im talking about here.
For example, I just learned Ohms Law in like 10 minutes over my lunch hour, leaving me plenty of internet surfing time and of course, time to write in my beloved blog. I just have to remember: I = V+R or is it V x R? V over R??? F*CK! How about that.... F over UCK.... I have some F over UCK divided by ING reading to do..... Oh well, I'll do it before my class.

***

On another note. Will you people stop putting your stupid poetry in your blogs? Gawd... We all know you ripped off 15 other poems from the internet, changed a couple of words and are now claiming it as your own. There is no way people can possibly still be coming up with poems creatively romanticizing the wind and rain and pretty little flowers. Write your dumb poem on a restaurant napkin, give it to your boyfriend or girlfriend and quit subjecting us to your pathetic attempts to sound mature and sophisticated.
Poetry is now #6 on my list of things not to put on your stupid blog that no one reads.

peace nick

Im original, are you?

So guess what? There is a Mason Jennings concert in Madison tonight, and I'm missing it. Bunk! What's that? Who is Mason Jennings? Well losers, maybe if you didn't solely rely on radio and MTV for your music, and instead had some original tastes, you would know who Mason Jennings is...
There's a crap load of music out there that doesn't make the radio for various reasons, that doesn't mean it isn't any good. But people are just too lazy to look for it, give it a try and expand their narrow interests. If you are still waiting for the latest Chili Peppers cd, you are a tool, you will always be a tool and you should leave my blog now.
Instead go to masonjennings.com, buy one of the cds, and enjoy some good music for once in your sorry, pathetic life.
There I feel better now that some of the frustration of missing his show is gone...

peace

nick

I still like the word blog...

So somewhere between waiting for my next meeting and voting for Lucky's cutest female bartender, I start flipping thru blogs, which has become a daily thing for me. Hey, gotta keep an eye on the competition... So right after the one with the two girls kissing in the rain... you know the one, dont lie... I catch the top of a blog with the most obnoxious statement Ive probably ever seen. It said - "If you aren't mad, you aren't paying attention." Well, now Im fricken mad... how stupid can one person be?
This is the problem with the world today. People are too friggin' busy being mad or frustrated or offended. I should hate my country, my boss and everyone around me because they are all out to get me and bring me down.
Here's my obnoxious saying - "If you aren't mad, good, enjoy you're life for once you fricken' automaton." I actually had to look automaton up to make sure I was using it correctly. That's a sad fact in and of itself, but I think it flows with the rest of my saying, so Im going to leave it.

***

Switching gears, time for a plug. If you are interested in knowing who my hero is, its Bart Brejcha from www.design-engine.com I was lucky enough to get some training from Bart (paid for, thank God) and he is hands down one of the brightest young business owners Ive ever met. His group of masterminds down there in the Windy City host "fight club" style debates on anything from the economy to CAD software. If you are into design, any type of design or even just wishing you were super cool, check out their website. Especially the feature on the Orange Skin Party... damn Bart, you the man, you the man...

peace.

Writers block already?

Man, this blogging stuff is hard work. You have to come up with somewhat original material, otherwise you really will be writing to no one. Which is more than likely the case anyhow, but, hey, one can dream.
So I think I will stay away from the political stuff for the most part, too many people talking about that already. Probably means no sports either, except for the occasional rip on the Packers punting unit... So no politics and no sports, agreed? If you want to read about Bush vs. Kerry, try CNN. And sports, well, ESPN of course.
That leads me to today's topic, which strangely enough I just thought up. What you should NOT put in your stupid blog that no one reads....

1. Song lyrics. Post the stupid song title, if we want the lyrics we will look them up.

2. Really stupid pictures. I dont like pictures, they're dumb. Especially yours.

3. Pink. I hate pink. Dont use it.

4. lke, rly fnky riting n stuf. Show some intelligence, eh?

5. Foreign language... stuff.... I only speak English. Comprendes?

Yeah, so that's about it. It's only 5 things, but I only get an hour for lunch.

Peace.

how did you get here?

my first blog post. fun. i guess more to come later. time to draft my third fantasy football team.

peace.