Hooters! Hooters!

When we first started trying to have a kid, I never fathomed having anything but a little girl. I always pictured us with a girl. And then we got pregnant, and besides for the assholes telling us we're having twins, people started predicting a boy. I would just stare blankly, like I didn't even know what that meant.

"Boy?" What language is that? Ihgfgs ufyhren iugvndjfh. Same difference.

Since then I've had to sort of reprogram myself. What if we do have a boy? Certainly it's a possibility, right? Even despite the fact that we always had sex standing on our heads under a full moon, and afterwords with drank our slurpys from the spoon side of the straw. Because that my friends is how you conceive a girl, or so we were told.

So I tried to picture what life would be like if we had a boy instead of a girl. I admit, it's hard. I spent so long imagining a girl, it's hard to imagine a boy, which, I admit that now thinking about it, makes it more likely in my mind we're having a boy. That's just how my life goes.

Everyone has their opinions on which sex is better. I've listened to them all. I don't like to, but I do. Who the hell wants to go into something like this with a biased opinion, thinking one sex is better? I also don't much care for people's political opinions, but that never seems to stop them either... I just assume you hate Bush, I don't need your whole diatribe as to why.

Well, since I don't want to be biased, I decided to create lists for each sex. A good list. A happy list. Because no matter what this child is, I will be happy. Obviously there are cons to each sex, but we won't address those until after the kid is born. I don't want to jinx this experience. So, feel free to add any you can think of, but remember, positive thoughts.

boy:
trips to Hooters!
someone to throw the ball around with
going to the mall, but to pick up chicks
when he plays hockey, I can coach
Sunday/Monday football on tv
someone to mow the lawn and take the garbage out
in a pinch, boys can pee just about anywhere
maybe he can figure out all the tools I inherited from my dad

girl:
the hot wife gets the abstinence talk responsibility
boyfriends make good battle axe throwing target practice
"why don't you go shopping with mom so dad can watch football"
playing dress up can occupy a whole afternoon
finally, someone else to help the hot wife paint
girls are just cuter

Ah. It's refreshing to know kids are so great!

Nick