Wedding Sex #1

Let's take a trip back in time. The year is 2002. The date, Saturday September 14th. A perfect early fall day in Wisconsin... the sun is shining.. the temperature is about 75... and the wedding bells are ringin'.

Children, it's time for Nick to get married. Despite being nervous, of course, the wedding goes well. A little side note here though, when you get married and you walk down thru the church together, and then you wait as people file out so you can hug them and whatever... don't say anything to people you don't recognize... trust me.

Anyways, after all the pictures and stuff, we do the cruise thru town, hit a bar... And I don't know how ya'll do weddings, like between the church and the dinner, but in Wisconsin we hit the bars. Yup, even on special occasions, we have to be piss drunk.

So we hit the bars, whatever, and then head over to the reception hall for dinner. We eat, I give some hardly romantic speech I hastily prepared the night before... See, I do fine in the romantic field if it's just for Amy... but if I have to get up in front of people and talk, my mind goes blank. But the crowd was drunk, I didn't have a mic... so, no one heard me ramble on anyways.

Now for everyone's favorite part... the dance. This is where the lights go down, the beer and other drinks flow, and people get their groove on. And did we get our groove on. I can't dance really, but I moved around the dance floor pretending pretty much all night.

The dance is also the part of the night where you start to catch people whom you know you never invited.

"Heyyyyy.... I know you! Were you invited? Yeah... I didn't think so... This ain't no funky reggae party, $5 at the door..."

We saw dozens of people we didn't invite. People I hadn't talked to for years showed up. Some people I didn't even know, never talked to, showed up. Ok fine. The beer was cheap, so, drink up.

Apparently two people who were not invited did... One of them (slut) came with my sister-in-law (we'll call her B). The other one (we'll call him T) came with an invited friend (we'll call him J). Following me yet? So slut, T and J, are drinking, dancing, having a good time... and then they decide to head outside to the parking lot. Remember this, I will come back to it.

So we are all dancing, whatever, and I look over and see my mother-in-law (m-i-l) bitching J out. And please excuse the language, but it's important.

m-i-l: "You better get checked for diseases, she f*cks N*GGERS!" (Whoa... See a pattern developing yet?)
J: "I didn't do anything, it was T!"

So I walk over to find out what is going on. Apparently they all go out into the parking lot, to B's car. Long story short (right...) my other sister-in-law (I have 3) walks by B's car and sees T and slut getting it on. She goes in and tells everyone.

So my m-i-l is bitching at J, B is bitching at slut for getting it on at her brother-in-law's wedding... in her car of all places... J sees me and pulls me aside...

J: "dude, I didn't do anything, it was all T"
me: "... why didn't you jump in?" (Remember, I'm drunk and think it's all funny...)

J: "dude, she wouldn't let me. She said she wouldn't do 2 guys at once."

I know, I know... wait just a f-ing minute....

So here you have some dumb slut, who is not invited to my wedding, goes out into the parking lot with 2 guys, screws 1 of them in her friend's car... and somehow she has the morals to say no way to just doing 2 guys at once???

I know, I was shocked too. But, that's the way it happened... how two uninvited people had sex at our wedding. Wedding Sex #2 someday will detail how we had sex at someone elses wedding 2 weeks later... someday...

peace nick